They seemed like such an awesome idea when you were angrily listening to Korn and Sevendust during your university years, but the tribal tattoos which adorn your torso now look more akin to the scraps of a leather jacket which have melded with your skin.
Not to worry! You can now bandy around words like “inked”, “tatts” and “tradesman” in your online hookup profiles. Congratulations! What was once an outlet for your repressed sexuality has become a gateway to guaranteed horn and genital lice.
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Yes, and that wisp of hair above the buttcrack suddenly becomes sexy, rather than middle aged. Is tehre a name for that wisp of hair? I know it’s not the treasure trail.
Oh god, I hope he regrets that. Unfortunately I’m guessing he’s too busy masturbating furiously to a Target catalogue.